Friday, August 25, 2006

where's the rush???

well i have been wanting to write a post for a while and the post count has now cumilated to 3 :p.


if you are in india and that too particularly in ahmedabad, then you would certainly be confounded by the behaviour of the common people outdoors. surely not like animals who become emancipated(or are atleast potrayed in the movies) in the great outdoors nevertheless it surely doesnt fail to catch the eye of person who is alien to it.

i really dont know if this tendency is cornered only in ahmedabad or the rest of india, but it wouldnt be hard to presume about the latter.

scene #1:
you are standing at a bus stop. waiting for a bus. there are other people as well waiting for the same bus. the bus comes along. it is empty! freeze frame: now typically one would wait till the bus comes to a halt and then let the conductor open the doors . then you board the bus. but no. our junta has it all figured out! the people as soon as they see the bus from a distance start gathering at a place (which by the way is about ~30 meters? or so from the actual bus stop!).

not feeling inundated the bus driver tries his best to halt at the bus stop. but as soon as the bus enters their territory they hunt for the door waiting for it to open/or open it themselves and then board the bus(i think its something sorta a personal victory!yes, first in the bus 3 times, in your face jerry! woohoo i am the king! sorta feeling.although no really bothers to laud him on his personal achievement.) now the bus actually comes to a halt at the bus stop with about 10 people holding the door in all possible directions,imagine that!the bus then halts for yet another 3 minutes or so and then departs.
freeze frame finish.

scene #2:
you are on your way to college. and to reach to it you need to board a train and that too in the general compartment.the train has arrived at the platform. the people who want to board the train faithfully pave the way for the people who want to disembark it.once done its a rat race. shouting ,fighting and altercations fills the then clement atmosphere. now everybody is in, time for the train to move,cause i am in, move go go, why is it not going. well the train lazily sits there for another few minutes and then goes ahead in its journey. now here is a more formal way,they know where it is going to stop and they know they cant stop it where that want it to. they know they would have to let the people out, so wait till it comes to a halt and then attack. better organised than the bus people.

scene #3:
this has to be the best one of all!
you move around the city quite often. and you have a vehicle. so you drive around the city in your gleaming machine. but there are lots of intersections. and in todays world they have traffic signals! dagnamit!! and to put the commuters at ease the traffic police has timers installed that indicate the time left till the signal goes green. but nothing will dissuade our amatuer f1 and superbike racers. no matter what number the timer flashes they have their engines revving up,ready to at the instant of it going green. now there is about 10 whole seconds(now thats a lot of time,for a traffic signal) but our people are half way on the road, religiously waiting for it to go green, since the timer flashed 15 seconds. now the inanimate traffic signal has caused their patience to reach its zenith. there is no stopping now. 10 seconds on the timer and you see people moving ahead! the traffic police however is no match for the sheer rush coming at them. also i have noticed one thing. even though you have no place to go ahead, the guy behind you will honk the hell out thereby insisting go ahead and you look at him puzzled,dude where? to which he replies in sign language and then you pay no heed. the honking then stops. now some people restrict themselves behind the stop line till the signal goes green. once it has gone green, their calm demeanour is overthrown by a crass personality which gives out a barrage of expletives, demanding you to go ahead.

well these scenarios concur to one unanswered question. that would be "where is the rush?" to which apparently many people will be without an answer but logically put, all of them would be given a chance to board the bus/ train , but we are too impatient to wait for our chance!!!!

till we meet again,adios!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

you got m@il

you switch on the internet connection and jot your username and password in the yahoo messenger and it pops a message which reads out that you have no new messages

yet with a spark of hope, you log into the site and again input your name and password only to see that somebody has actually remembered you,though its not from the crowd you would expect or want!

to your dismay you find that your inbox is empty, but your bulk folder has mails!!!

hesitantly you open your bulk folder only to find mails that either amuse you or what were they thinking type of mails!?!

there is a guy who constantly tries to sell me rolex watches at cheap rates. then he adds that they are rolex look alike and they are just like rolexes.

to escape the wrath of the spam filter(which by the way is very weak, in case of yahoo), some mails have weird stories, with their motives revealed later.

then you have pre approved loans. for a person who doesnt earn!!! :P

then this is the best : c@n you s@t!sfy your girlfriend? then the list follows with various medications that assure you of increase in penal length with absolutely no side effects. ahh... i always am strides by the achievements of the medical world.

similar to these are |ncre@se your penal length by 4 inches.... :P

you also get mails from a person who is in possession of a long lost treasure and wants to share it with you. i lucky or what!!!!

and then you have ppl selling degrees of your liking with authenticity guarenteed!!!and you must hurry this for a limited time only!!!

and the most amusing part is that, the mailing address doesnt have your address, it has been addressed to some other character.

and they seem to be relentless in sending them and they are increasing by the day.


well check your bulk folder now, cause you got mail

Friday, August 04, 2006

funny moments around you

long time no post....hmm..

well here is one :)

since i was out of the house for a considerable period of time for the past few days, i noticed few events that were quite funny....

i was descending the stairs in the college when i saw a notice board which read out :

Inaugration of abc building ,By def

thats how usual a normal announcement looked like.but the authorities here took care that the notice aroused everybody's interest and the following was appended:

(Refreshments provided)

seemed like the only way to have a sizeable audience would be by assuring them that there is something in store for them if they attend the function. :P

this event happened while i was coming back from the station .

the time was 6 pm and the evening rush was at its peak. with hardly any space to drive comfortably and to be on your toes all the time , you will certainly find it amusing when there is a donkey trying to ride the other donkey who is trying to escape this event ,yet the riding donkey is relentless in his pursuit and that too in your lane with the donkey going the opposite way . donkeys this way ,the public that way turning their heads.

this one happened not with me but with a friend of mine. money speaks !

he had come to the college for some work and found that the intended sir was not at his desk.upon asking the peon for his whereabouts ,he doesnt reply back. when the peon saw a Rs.50 flashing, he grabbed it and reached for the nearest phone and was heard saying :

Sir ,where are you?. Sir would have replied ,"Why what happened?". To which the peon says,"You have to sign some documents." and the next thing you see is the sir walking towards his you think they are working together?

i ought go out more often, there are tons of pranks that go unnoticed and it is time that someone shot it ,on a camera that is ;)